Change is infinite, there is no stopping it and no knowing the lengths it will go to.
What a difference a year makes. But I have a horrible habit of never being satisfied in the now.
Almost a year ago I felt complete freedom like I had never known before and I loved it. I had no university, no obligations, no strings attached. I didn’t want to settle because I wanted to experience everything and do it my own way.
But now I feel tied to the ground again.
But I am stood still in a moment that I know I don’t belong in.
I am a completely different person than I was a year ago. I am in a completely different place and I feel fake.
I feel like I am pretending.
I got comfortable. It all became so easy.
What have I got myself into?
I have cravings. I have wishes. I have dreams. I don’t want my life to go by where I am stuck in a dull and frustrating string of nothings. I have that itch for change.
I pine over the time when all I had to rely on was myself, where making decisions were made for me and me alone, regardless of what others wanted. The only person I had to impress and satisfy was myself and that fulfilled my selfish nature to the highest degree.
I talk myself in circles until I forget what I want. How do you know for sure?